So this bruised girl becomes a confused adolescent, becomes a paranoid woman trying to appease society, knowing all the while she was made for more. More than sucking in her stomach and counting calories and worrying about how her butt looks in a pair of jeans.
And yes, it is normal to be disappointed in ourselves. To sometimes regret the reflection staring back at us. It doesn’t mean we have an eating disorder. But it probably means we’re discontent with our body image, when shouldn’t we be kinder to ourselves? More loving?
The problem is that we, as women, haven’t been encouraged to love ourselves. Because that wouldn’t feed the cosmetics industry. So, our bruises remain hidden under layers of cover-up, and we step into womanhood, beaten down and searching for someone to make us feel better about ourselves.
But unless we remove the makeup and allow our bruises to heal, we’ll never feel better.
We get married, anyway, and there’s nothing magical about two broken people vowing to love each other for better or worse. It’s crazy hard. And some days, it feels impossible.
You don’t know who you are, and you despise the person you think you are, and then you marry someone who claims to adore you, and you become convinced he is lying because who can really love you? You don’t even love yourself.
(excerpt from Mom in the Mirror, Chapter 2: A Bruised Beginning; NOW AVAILABLE here for 40 % off, in Barnes and Noble Bookstores, and wherever books and e-books are sold)
**Today Lisa-Jo Baker is giving away a copy of Mom in the Mirror on The Gypsy Mama, HERE.**
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