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On Infertility and the Memory of a Daughter

by Emily Wierenga | Sep 27, 2013 | baby, children, daughter, faith, God, grief, infertility, miracle, miscarriage, prayer, pregnancy

I have a memory of my daughter, and yet, she never was.We weren’t supposed to be able to have children. Doctors told me when I was 13 and dying on the hospital bed from eating too little that I probably wouldn’t ever conceive, and then, when I relapsed as...

Imperfect Prose Link-Up: When You’re an Affirmation Junkie

by Emily Wierenga | Jun 12, 2013 | affirmation, baby, birth, children, faith, junkie, love, pregnancy, prodigal magazine

  My nephew, Lucas, was born with two holes in his heart.He didn’t get to feel his mother’s arms holding him until two weeks after he was born, because he had open heart surgery and was hooked up to tubes that were saving his life.She held him for the...

In which we’re trying to have a baby

by Emily Wierenga | Feb 1, 2013 | adoption, baby, birth, children, conception, daughter, daughters, destiny, family, fertility, God, pregnancy, sons

i could see he was surprised. my husband. i’d sat him down and said, “i was thinking of announcing this on the blog so i thought i should ask you first…”and i could see the questions in his eyes, and then i told him, “i think we should...

why i want to have a little girl

by Emily Wierenga | Dec 27, 2012 | a deeper story, baby, crib, daughter, dreams, empty, faith, family, girl, God, hopes, infertility, prayers, womb

we moved kasher from the crib to the bunks today, and aiden from the bottom to the top. and now that our foster boys, joey and jin, are back at their mom’s, the house seems a lot quieter–and the crib stands empty. Source: 100-mile-house-log-homes.com via...

imperfect prose on thursdays: the pain of giving birth

by Emily Wierenga | Nov 14, 2012 | baby, birth, Brandee Shafer, die, doubting thomas, God, imperfect prose on thursdays, motherhood, prayer, pregnancy, spirituality

Art by Dot Samuel at Psalms of Samuel in Watercolor(post by Brandee Shafer)They counted to three and, working together, swung me from bed to table. Strange to witness their strain when I felt nearly weightless; I am a pendulum, I thought, tugged by time. I am...

when God dies, all over again

by Emily Wierenga | Feb 26, 2012 | baby, death, funeral, God, heaven, love, mother

i forget, for a moment, how angry i am at God, when i hold my new nephew, whose brown feet conduct an invisible orchestra.babies give God a face, and when you look at them, it’s so easy to believe. but when they die, at 18 months, it’s so easy to stop...

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